Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Adventures in Parenting: Tequila Edition

Here's a fun endeavor for our more adventurous parents.  This is a step-by-step guide to sure-fire laughter and joy:

Step 1: Invite friends over for a cookout and margaritas.

Step 2: While the food is cooking, use a small bottle of Patron Silver to make several rounds of margaritas.

Step 3: Observe a nine-year-old boy playing with the now-empty bottle, which has a cool shape and a convenient cork.

Step 4: Observe that your wife is not in the room.

Step 5: Emit a mad scientist laugh and tell the boy we're going to play a trick on Mom.

Step 6: Rinse the bottle well, but leave a little water (about 3 shots worth).

Step 7: Have the boy walk up to Mom, hold up the bottle, and say, "Dad said I could drink this!"

Step 8 (must be done IMMEDIATELY after step 7, timing is critical in comedy routines): The boy uncorks the bottle and chugs while Mom stands up in a panic saying, "No, I'm sure Daddy...NO!!!"

Step 9: Laugh. 

Step 10: Catch your breath and wipe the snot bubble from your nose.

Step 11: Laugh.

Step 12: Repeat steps 9-11.

Hope you did something fun on your holiday weekend too!


Bane of Anubis said...

Step 13: Sleep on the couch.

This is definitely my kind of guide.

Laurel said...


Rick Daley said...

It really was a small bottle, not hangover inducing. Luckily so, because that was Saturday and I would hate to have killed the weekend so early in.

What was just as cool as my prank was the ultimate foodgasm I had when I ate my dinner. I slow-roasted a 7.75-pound bone-in pork shoulder. I gave it a 24-hour rest with a spice rub before it hit the grill, which was stocked with charcoal and mesquite. I even made homemade BBQ sauce and slaw, and my wife made a strawberry pie.

If we ever have the opportunity to invite you over for dinner, it would be in your best interest to attend...

kdrausin said...

Oh my! You would get along so well with my husband.

Domey Malasarn said...

Is it the dad or the son that has the snot bubble? I want to make sure I get everything right.

Rick Daley said...

Oh, that was totally me. My son doesn't have the social grace to actually wipe away the snot bubble. He's a 9-year-old boy...

Alexander Field said...

This is fantastic! I can't wait to try it....thanks for the short story in a step by step list.... : )

Rick Daley said...

Alexander- Thanks! I like it when life steps up to the plate and practically writes the blog post for me. Sure makes things easier.

L. T. Host said...

What's your address? Me and my husband will be there by Sunday at the latest. Hope you'll still have strawberry pie left. :)

Man. I have a feeling it's only a matter of time after we have kids before my husband starts pulling this sort of stuff on me. Luckily, I fully intend to do it back to him.

Damyanti said...

LOL...this sounds like a hoot. I live too far away to attend any dinner parties you throw, but I can wish you more such parties, and foodgasms!

Rick Daley said...

LT- We're not good with leftovers. Thing just end up down the hatch too quickly round here.

Damyanti- If I ever make it to Singapore I'll throw a special dinner there just for you!