A-Z Challenge: Legs

Okay, time is short so I'll just get to the point.

My freaking legs hurt.  Feet too.  Not agonizing pain, but that dull ache that sets into 41-year-old joints after running 9 miles on them.

First, some background: there is a half-marathon coming up in May.  I've participated in this race twice before.  I've declared I will never run a half-marathon again twice before, too.  Turns out I'm not real good at keeping personal promises.

The run itself was great.  The weather was ideal; my knees were stiff for the first couple minutes but they loosened up.  My wife ran with me and she had a great run, too.  She went a little faster than she normally runs, and I went a little slower than I normally run, and we both ran a lot closer to each other than we normally run.  It was fun.  

I feel okay right now.  I'm sitting down.  After the run I showered then lit some charcoal and cooked up some porterhouse steaks.  We had split half of a cow with my aunt and uncle; these steaks were fresh, grass-fed, all-natural, hormone- and antibiotic-free beef...for only $2.99 / lb.  I'm still lingering in food heaven, sipping on some wine and digesting.

But my future awaits.  This bliss soon will end.  For in my future: Stairs.

Stairs are my ultra arch-enemy at the moment.  They are evil.  Going up is decidedly worse than going down, but I cut them no slack in either direction.  They are hurtful, mean objects.  Soon it will be bedtime, and that means the stairs and I will have an unpleasant confrontation.

Legs.  Ouch.  And since this is a series focused on music, I feel obliged to point out that ZZ top wrote a song about legs.  It's a great song, but it approaches the subject from a much different perspective than I have presented today.

A-Z Challenge: Kelly Clarkson

This letter was a struggle.  I'm not a huge KISS fan.  Kansas has a few great songs and I've seen them live twice, but I can't carry a whole post about them.  Then my wife suggested Kelly Clarkson, and I thought, "Why not?"

(NOTE: My wife also once suggested I write about Carrie Underwood. She would like me to clarify that the suggestion was in jest, and I'm assuming she'll want me to point out the Kelly Clarkson idea was, too.  Once she finds out I've written about it.)

I'll try to tell you everything I know about Kelly Clarkson:

- My wife told me she won the first season of American Idol because she copies that Mariah Carey wave-your-finger-while-you-sing motion real good.  She may have used slightly different terms, but that's the gist of it.

- It is rumored that they actually made an American Idol movie, and Kelly Clarkson starred in it, but it's a hard rumor to confirm because the only ones who have actually seen this movie are Bigfoot, the Abominable Snow Man, and the Tooth Fairy.

- I'm going out on a limb here, but I think she was big on the radio, I don't know.  I don't listen to whatever stations play her music.  I hear her name a lot, and I know she sings, so putting two and two together...

- She was in one of the funniest scenes of "The 40-Year Old Virgin": Andy (Steve Carrell) screams her name as he gets his chest waxed.  Actor Paul Rudd suggested that line.

Well, that sums it up!

A-Z Challenge: Just a Little Light

I'm going to focus on one of my favorite singers and songs for "J."

Brent Mydland joined the Greteful Dead in 1979, and played with them until his death in 1990.  It wasn't sex or rock-n-roll that killed him, it was the other one.  He has a hard-drinking, hard-partying kind of guy, and he overdosed on a speedball (an injected mix of cocaine and heroin).  I don't know why it is that the most tortured souls have such a soulful sound, but he's not the only case.

His voice captivates me.  He has a scratchy growl that can't be imitated, it must be lived, but he also sang with passion and range.  "Just a Little Light" is very fitting for him, the lyrics seem personal:

Well there ain't nobody safer than someone who doesn't care
And it isn't even lonely when no one's ever there
I had a lot of dreams once, but some of them came true
The honey's sometimes bitter when fortune falls on you...
I love the imagery here:
It's even harder to be heartless when you look at me that way
You're as mighty as the flower that will grow the stones away

This video is taken from a live show I have on CD, and this version of the song is great:

A-Z Challenge: Idol (Billy, not American)

I was fifteen when I saw Billy Idol in concert in Dallas.  It was the first real rock concert of my somewhat grown-up life.  I had seen concerts when I was younger, living in Akron...the most memorable being the Cleveland Philharmonic doing a performance of the 1812 Overture, in which they fired off forty or so cannons.  That was impressive.  But I was only 8 or 9 years old then.  I also saw Barry Manilow and Sha-Na-Na around that time, but those don't count, either.

My friend Chris Freezzo's brother took us.  My friend from Akron, John Shalowitz, was visiting in Texas that summer.  John taught us the secret words to yell back during, "Mony, Mony."  It felt pretty damn cool at fifteen to be at a rock concert yelling, "Hey, get laid, get f%^$ed!"

It was a great show.  This was in the old days, you know, when MTV played music videos.  Well, maybe you don't know.  Let me tell you: a long, long time ago, MTV played music videos.  All the time.  Stupid reality shows hadn't even been invented yet.  Music videos were like really short shows with one song playing in the background. 

It's a lost art these days, but back then, music videos were quite popular, and Billy Idol put out a lot of them, so I was quite familiar with his songs and the complexities that make a concert worth going to.  I mentioned the callback for "Mony, Mony" but there were more, ever so complex and subtle crowd-participation cues, that I was happy to participate in:

During "Rebel Yell" we cried, "More, More More"
During "Dancing With Myself" we sang, "Oh-oh-oh-oh"
During "Flesh for Fantasy" we yelled, "Flesh!"
And, for the most complex bit, during "White Wedding" we all screamed, "Start again!"

There were also lights and fire, which took the awesomness up to eleven.  And at fifteen, there were no sex or drugs (although I did have a pack of cigarettes...but I was too scared to smoke one in front of Mark Frezzo, because I didn't know if he would tell on me).  It was just pure rock and roll.

A-Z Challenge- Heart

Heart spent a long time trying before they made it big.  Their roots go back to 1963-64, the same time many other giants of classic rock were forming.  They didn't have the advantage of a TV show where young people could karaoke their ways to instant stardom, which is kind of ironic because their songs are picked by female vocalists on all the singing shows.  Their decade of starving artistry before their album Dreamboat Annie, with the songs "Magic Man" and "Crazy on You," carved them a spot in rock and roll history.

I was going to say Anne and Nancy Wilson are at the heart of the band, but I couldn't bring myself to go there.  They are the core of the group, through.  Other session musicians have played with them, but it's Nancy's guitar and, most especially, Anne's vocals that drive their music.

Anne Wilson's voice is amazing.  Her range is vast, and she makes it sounds effortless.  The range is what draws so many young Idol-wannabes to try and cover her, and the effort they have to throw behind the singing is what brings many of them down.  Very few can do it.

I used to play in a band with a singer who could, though.  We covered "Barracuda," which is a tricky song, musically.  The odd time signatures and tight changes elevate this from a jamming groove to a tight-knight ride, and guitar / bass / drums must be in sync to pull it off...and even then, without a good singer, there is no song.  When we played with Catherine, she could just step to the mic, open her mouth, and her voice went there, no different than regular breathing.  Those were some great gigs.

A-Z Challenge: Grateful Dead

I have some really fond memories of the Grateful Dead, and of going to shows during my college years, when I was indulging in many of the indulgences for which Deadheads are known. Only I can’t really remember the shows themselves.  I just know I went there.  That’s probably why Deadheads would bring pen and paper to the shows, and write down each song as it began, and compare set lists in the parking lot after the show.  They also indulged, and had little hopes of remembering the little details, like which songs they heard ten minutes ago.

I jest, a little.  I do know the first song I heard the Dead play live was “Jack Straw,” and that first show also included, “Touch of Gray.”  And I remember that they played Drums and Space at every show I saw, but that’s a cop-out, because they played Drums and Space at every show, period.

I had some great times at the shows, even when I didn’t get in.  The parking lot parties, with the drum circles, guitars, and wares being sold on Shakedown Street; the smell of incense and herbs;  and the giant PSHHHT! sound of punching balloons being filled with laughing gas (Nitrous Oxide, of just Nitrus, or “Hippie Crack”).  Good times.

My favorite period of the Grateful Dead ended before my first show, with the passing of Brent Mydland.  Brent was their third keyboard player, and a great singer / songwriter.  I’ll talk about him more in a few letters.  Their first keyboard player, Pigpen, died in the early 70s from stomach complications brought on by excessive drinking.  Pigpen was Janis Joplin’s main squeeze.  She also died from alcoholism. 

Their second keyboard player was Keith Godchaux, who preferred piano (Pigpena and Mydland played the Hammond Organ, primarily), and whose wife Donna sang backup.  I really don’t like Donna’s backing vocals, so I rate her tenure during the latter 70s as my least favorite Dead era.  Don't get me wrong, I still like the music from that time, I just like it less.

By the time I attended shows, they were rotating between Bruce Hornsby and Vince Welnick on keys.  Both very suitable players, but neither had Mydland’s soulful voice.

And, in case you didn’t know but were curious, the name comes from a phrase in a folklore dictionary, and Grateful Dead means, "the soul of a dead person, or his angel, showing gratitude to someone who, as an act of charity, arranged their burial."

A-Z Challenge: Flecktone

Ever heard of a Flecktone?

Well, you should.  Bela Fleck and the Flecktones are an incredible group of musicians.  They are almost beyond description, at least in simple terms.  They are jazzy, but not a jazz band.  They are classically influence, but not classical.  They are funky, but not funkadelic.

They are awesome.

Bela Fleck is an banjo virtuoso, who can fire off the Beverly Hillbillies theme (he did the theme in the movie version, which is the only decent part) and then transition to Bach...and make it seem natural.

The Flecktones are Victor and Roy Wooten, and other musicians join them.  Victor plays bass, and is an absolute master (NOTE: I also play bass.  Not as good as Victor, but I don't suck.)  His brother Roy plays the synth-axe drumitar.  Basically, it's a drum machine that is somewhat, but not completely, shaped like a guitar.

I imagine many of you readers (NOTE: Ha!  There's only like 6 of you...) have not heard of, or more importantly, heard Bela Fleck and the Flecktones.  I implore you, because implore sounds like a very important word, to click the video below and treat yourself to some sonic wonder.  I'm listening to it right now...

Or jump right to Part II, which begins with the Victor Wooten bass solo:

A-Z Challenge: Ebert

I first started reading Roger Ebert's reviews back in 1997. I was working as a trainer at an outsourced call center company, on the CompuServe program.  One of the perks was a free CompuServe account, including access to all the forums.  My favorite was Ebert's movie forum.  I started reading his reviews regularly...I doubt I missed more than a handful of weeks in the past decade and a half.

I didn't always agree with him, but that was usually a trashy movie I liked but he didn't.  If he liked a movie, I was apt to like it, too.  That's not really the point, though...I didn't read his reviews because I needed a gut-check before shelling out cash for a ticket.  I read reviews of many movies I had no intention of ever seeing, simply because I enjoyed his writing and his wit.

And Ebert did have a sharp wit; he could trash a movie better than anyone else.  The best example is the battle he had with Rob Schneider over the "Deuce Bigalow" movies.  A critic (well, many critics, actually) had panned the film, and Schneider made a statement to the effect of, "Your opinion doesn't count because you haven't earned any awards yourself."

Ebert replied, "But Schneider is correct, and Patrick Goldstein has not yet won a Pulitzer Prize. Therefore, Goldstein is not qualified to complain...As chance would have it, I have won the Pulitzer Prize, and so I am qualified. Speaking in my official capacity as a Pulitzer Prize winner, Mr. Schneider, your movie sucks."

When Roger Ebert fought cancer he won the first round, although the battle left him missing his lower jaw and it robbed him of the ability to speak (and eat).  His lost voice never impacted me...I was not accustomed to hearing it.  I never watched his TV show, and aside from a few interviews with Howard Stern, I had never really listened to him speak.  To me his voice was the same: it was his written voice, his general way with words.

I will miss that voice.  May he rest in peace.

A-Z Challenge: Dogs

I think Pink Floyd’s Animals is a great work of art, even if George Orwell did it first.  My favorite song on the Album is “Dogs,” a 16-minute ballad of a back-stabbing, greedy middle-manager.  Used by the Pigs to keep the Sheep in line, the Dogs will do anything to get ahead.

You have to be trusted by the people that you lie to
So that when they turn their backs on you
You’ll get the chance to put the knife in…  
The guitar solo that follows those lines is punctuated by cymbal crashes, and the cymbals sound like whip-lashes.  I love how Pink Floyd uses sound to help paint a visual picture.  They layer in synthesized dogs barking, the whip…it all reinforces the words and the theme. 
Then there’s the guitar work.  Dogs is about 90% of side A, and it’s essentially all David Gilmour doing sonic magic with his strat.
This was a good period for Pink Floyd.  They were riding high on the success of Dark Side of the Moon and Wish You Were Here, but still ahead of the tempers that flared up during The Wall.  In fact, it was during the Animals tour that Roger Waters came up with the concept of The Wall.  Roger Waters got sick of people lighting off fireworks and doing everything under the sun other than listen to the music. At a concert in Montreal, one particularly drunk and unruly fan rushed the stage and Roger lost it and spit on him, then cussed out the whole crowd.  After that he started to imagine a wall between him and the audience…

A-Z Challenge: Cream

I almost used Conundrum, which is no band or song I ever heard, but rather a cry of distress because I have too many C-options.  My first pick was Comfortably Numb, one of my favorite songs by my favorite band.  But I have plenty of other opportunities to talk about Pink Floyd, so I’ll give that a pass for now.

Next, I thought Credence Clearwater Revival, because not only are they a seminal part of rock history, complete with a case study in how to get screwed over by a record company, but there are two C-words in their name.

My wife suggested Carrie Underwood, and I could go on for days about her song “Jesus Take the Wheel” and how, in my opinion, Jesus would really want her to try to steer.

But then my wife suggested Eric Clapton and Cream.  Jackpot.  Not only can I bundle in two C-words out of that, I can get two C-Words out of it.

Cream broke records (NOTE: Not literally) and are credited for being the world’s first supergroup.  It’s really a storybook situation: Ginger Baker (NOTE: He even has a storybook character name, you know?) really liked Eric Clapton’s guitar playing, and Eric liked Ginger’s drumming, so they decided to start a band.  Eric really liked Jack Bruce’s bass playing and singing, and he suggested to Ginger they add him.  Jack Bruce and Ginger baker hated each other and in prior bands had gotten into fistfights and altercations involving knives, so naturally the dynamics of rock and roll brought them back together.

Despite the raging inferno of egotistical hatred that was the rhythm section, Cream wrote some phenomenal music, and their liver performances paved the way for the likes of Led Zeppelin and Rush.  From re-arrangements of classic blues tunes such as “Spoonful” and “Crossroads” to “White room and “Sunshine of Your Love” they pulled their talents together to build out a new wing in the annals of rock history.

And my personal connection to Eric Clapton:  His wife is from Columbus, and his daughter was born here, at Riverside hospital, delivered by the same doctor who helped bring my first son into the world a month later.  So we're pretty much related.  That's way cool.

A-Z Challenge: Billy Joel

Many times, songwriting is the work of a team of musicians and producers.  Sometimes, though, all that songwriting talent condenses in an individual, and you get someone who can play an instrument (or many instruments), and sing, and write music, and write great lyrics.  Billy Joel is a fine example of that kind of talent.  The guy can do everything.

His songs are both simple and complex.  His chords patterns are not your typical I, IV, V turn-arounds that make up most rock and roll.  Nuanced movements from major to minor, and accents like 7ths and 9ths find their way easily into his melodies. 

What I like most about Bill Joel’s songs are the lyrics.  He is a fantastic story-teller, and his music has rich characters.  Think of the patrons at the Piano Man’s bar…from the waitress and her politics to the bartender, John, they have feelings and ambitions; they are real.

And his social commentary is not without is sharp edges.  In “Only the Good Die Young” he asks Virginia (fitting, symbolic name, don’t you think?):

Your mother never cared for me
But did she ever say a prayer for me?

A little biting sarcasm to the religious establishment, but a valid point. 

In “The Stranger” we join him in confronting our darker sides. 

Some are satin, some are steel
Some are silk and come are leather
They’re the faces of a stranger
But we love to try them on

And when his lover’s stranger kicks him right between the eyes, he has the self-awareness to ask

Did you ever let your lover
See the stranger in yourself?

And then there’s the old fashioned fun of “Still Rock and Roll to Me.”  The determination to live as he pleases in “My Life” (Go ahead with your own life / Leave me alone).  The rock and roll excesses found in “Big Shot.”  The simple expression of love in “Just the Way You Are.” 

Yeah, this guy’s got it all.  Except the business sense.  He let his brother-in-law manage his finances, and that idiot lost tens of millions of dollars of poor Billy’s money.  I guess you can’t have everything.

A-Z Challenge: Abbey Road

Last year I used movies for my A-Z Theme.  This year it's music, and to kick off the letter A, I'm focusing on The Beatles (specifically their final studio album, Abbey Road, for you letter police).

You can’t deny that The Beatles had a strong influence on rock and roll.  Well, you could, but you’d be waaay wrong.  So don’t go there. 

The Beatles covered such a vast range of styles it’s difficult to find genres they didn’t touch.  The Gregorian chant, maybe, but even that is probably backwards-masked onto The White Album.

Abbey Road was their final studio effort (even though Let It Be was released later), and it’s one of the finest albums ever produced.  From their roots in German bars to being “bigger than Jesus,” The Beatles grew as musicians, even as they grew apart as bandmates.  No one was expecting another record, but they plunged the depths of their talent for one final go, putting down the boxing gloves and collaborating the way they used to, with George Martin (the 5th Beatle).

Even Abbey Road’s cover is iconic and enigmatic, perpetuating the “Paul is Dead” mythos that started with Sgt. Pepper and a whole lot of weed, or something stronger.  John is dressed all in white, looking very Jesus-like and leading the procession across the street.  Paul—the dead man—is barefoot and out of step with the others.  Ringo follows as a pallbearer, and George is dressed in denim as the gravedigger.  Or so goes the conspiracy theory, at least.  The band denies starting the whole “Paul is Dead” legacy, but it’s not hard to imagine them playing along and poking fun at it. 

The track list on Abbey Road is eclectic, and it plays well to the A-Side / B-Side groupings that are absent from today’s world of CDs and a la carte song downloads.  “Come Together” opens the album with a good rock groove, and “I Want You” rounds out Side A with an extended prog rock jam.  The B-Side montage that closes the album flows with symphonic grace and poetic meaning.  It’s really deep shit.

Abbey Road also contains some great contributions from George Harrison, “Something” and “Here Comes the Sun.”  It even has a Ringo song, “Octopus’s Garden.”  Like I said, The Beatles all worked together to bring their tenure as a band to a fitting close.

“And in the end, the love you take
Is equal to the love you make.”

My Next Big Thing

The bundle of verbal awesome that is Sue Quinn tagged me in a blog meme.  If you follow this blog, you know it has been neglected worse than a toothbrush at a hillbilly hoedown, so I guilted myself into accepting the honor in order to inspire an actual New Post.

Brace yourselves.

What is the title of your next book?
Smart Alec
And it’s written by a smart ass.  Fitting.

Where did the idea come from for the book?
My son and I thought it up together.  He wanted to write a book with me, and we brainstormed the character (a boy who can read minds) and the core of the plot (cool  / dangerous stuff happens to him). 

He typed up the outline, and we didn’t do anything with it for about a year.  Then I hit a wall on a different WIP, and I took a swipe at Smart Alec one day.  I didn’t tell my son I had started without him until I had about 10,000 words down.  He. Was. Pissed.

I let him read the beginning and he liked it, so it’s cool now. 

What genre does your book fall under?
It’s a YA thriller.  It’s tell you more, but why waste the time when there’s a one-sentence description coming  after two more questions…

What actors would you choose to play the part of your characters in a movie rendition?
My preference would be for the book to be such a huge phenomenon before it was optioned that it could propel newcomers to stardom, rather than rely on big star names for box office draw.

What is the one sentence synopsis of your book?
Alec can read the mind of anyone he’s looking at and takes advantage of it, but when he gets kidnapped and blindfolded he has to escape using something he’s neglected since he discovered his power: his own wits.

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?
Time will tell.  If my other books start to fly off the shelf, I’ll probably stay Indie, but I may get back into the world of querying just for fun. (NOTE: Right. Who the f%#@ queries for fun?)

So to spare me the indignity of querying, please recommend my books to people:

The Man in the Cinder Clouds, the real story of how Kris Kringle came to be known as Santa Claus.  It wasn’t easy.

Rudy Toot-Toot, a little boy whose special power will blow you away.  Literally.  It’s a real gas.  I’d tell you more but I don’t want to spill the beans.

How long did it take you to write the first draft of the manuscript?
The clock is still ticking, so I can’t say yet.

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?
That’s tough.  Alec is the only one who can read minds and it takes place in the present, so it’s on a different level from Sue Quinn’s awesome Mindjack Trilogy, but it still has mind reading, so it's in league.

Alec also goes up against a nasty antagonist…a teacher who has a dangerous obsession for a girl that Alec likes.  It’s not going to be Kiss the Girls creepy, but it will have an edge.

Who or what inspired you to write this book?
When my son and I plotted it out, we were working with a middle grade Alec.  About 30,000 words in, he grew to adolescence, and I upped the ante to young adult.  There’s more complexity to the story and emotions that way, and it’s more fun to write.

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?
Alec knows what you are thinking.  Literally…as long as he can see you, he can read your mind.  It’s a great way to ace tests, and football rocks when you know the other team’s plays, but when Alec discovers a teacher’s dangerous obsession for a classmate, he stops being selfish with his ability and uses it to protect Emma Whitaker from Mr. Schmidt.  As Alec spends more time with Emma, his new relationship puts an old relationship with his best friend at risk…but it also brings out the over-protective-psycho in his history teacher.  When Mr. Schmidt kidnaps Alec and blindfolds him, Alec is rendered powerless.  Now he has to escape using something he has neglected for a long time: his own wits.

And now for the obligatory tagging!  Here are some writers whose works I am interested in reading (or reading more of).  Let's see if they are as easy to goad into participation as I was:
Scott G.F. Bailey
Alex J. Cavanaugh
Belinda Nichol
Travis Erwin
Anne Gallagher

Book Give-Away!

No, not here...Over at Sheryl Hart's blog!

She's hosting an interview with yours truly and I'm giving away a signed copy of Rudy Toot-Toot to a random commentor (on that blog, not this one...).  Head on over, leave a comment, and cross your fingers!

Reflections on the A-Z Challenge

Back in the spring I participated in the A-Z blogfest challenge, posting almost every day for a month and writing about my favorite movies.

Today Alex Cavanaugh, one of the A-Z sponsors and blogging ninja extraordinaire, posted an interview with me about that experience.  I gave him my typical smart-ass answers.  Hop on over to the A-Z challenge blog to check it out!

Potty Humor!

Ever wonder why kids are so fascinated with potty humor?

Me too, and luckily for me, awesome YA Author Sue Quinn let me pontificate on the subject on her blog!  Check it out, click here.

And while you're there, poke around to around to learn more about Sue and her books, the Mindjack series is a lot of fun!

Sand Art- The Reader

Thanks to D.G. Hudson for the inspiration / suggestion.  An open book, indeed...along with a reader absorbed in its pages.

What book its it?  Why, it's Rudy Toot-Toot, by yours truly!  The sand version slightly thicker than the print or Kindle versions. 

The sculpture is slightly incomplete (about 95%)...a thunderstorm popped up and I had to abandon my efforts in the final details in order to not get hit by lightning.  I guess I'm not the world's most dedicated sand artists, but at least I survived to sculpt again.  It may be a while, since we are leaving first thing in the morning.

Here's a play by play on how I created the reader:

Step 1- Make a rough outline.

Step 2- Make a huge pile of sand.  This took 15 minutes.

Step 3- Add water.  I dumped about 8 buckets full of water on the pile.  The water makes the sand stick together better.

Step 4- Make a rough shape.  Basically, remove sand until I have the shape I want.  It's rare that I add more on to the pile.

Step 4- Front view.  The head is exaggerated, because I will whittle it away.  Start big and refine the sculpture as detail is added.

Step 5- Detail.  I have a paint scraper to make cuts and fine lines.  Making angled cuts at the bottom where the sculpture meets the beach creates shadows, which add depth to the work and keep it from getting washed out in the pictures.

Front view.

Head-on.  This was bigger, so I could put more detail in the face than my mermaid had.

Side view.

Reading over his shoulder- Rudy Toot-Toot by Rick Daley!

Angled view, I like the way the shadows fall on this one.  My son Vic is in the background.

The total effort = 1 hour 15 minutes.  The hardest part was taking the pictures...I couldn't see my phone screen at all in the beach sunlight, so I could only hope a few of them turned out!  Then, I almost wiped them all off my phone, which was giving low data warnings.  Luckily they survived...

Sand Art- Mermaid Edition

Many pictures of one sculpture today.  This sand mermaid is probably the most intricate sculpture I've attempted to date.  It took about an hour and twenty minutes from start (piling up a bunch of sand) to finish (the cross-hatch lines on her tail and fins).  Now I'm brainstorming for the next sculpture...I think I have one more in me before we head home.  Any suggestions?

Sand Art- 2012 Edition

If you've been following this blog for a while, you know I love to make sand sculptures at the beach.  I'm no professional sand artist, but I know how to have fun with it.  My past works range from Bugs Bunny, the Sphinx, and alligators, to Kris Kringle napping under an evergreen tree and sand swimmers.

So here we are in Hilton Head for our annual vacation, and this is what the tide brought in...

This frog was my first creation...

Then I made a dragonfly for him to snack on...

...while a hungry cobra eyes the Frog!

Breaking News!

This just in...

WASHINGTON, D.C. (August 8, 2012) – Political discourse in the US took a highly anticipated turn and devolved into a childish name-calling contest.

It all started when the Obama camp slammed Mitt Romney, calling him a “Doodyhead.”  The Romney campaign, in retaliation, accused the president of having cooties since the third grade.  Fact-checking sources were not able to confirm or deny the latter accusation, as Obama’s elementary school records are sealed.

“I think Obama should release his grade-school files to prove that the accusation is false,” said Rush Limbaugh.  “Until he does that, we’ll all just have to assume that he has the cooties, and anyone whose hand he shakes on the campaign trail will get them, too.”

David Axelrod, Obama’s chief strategist, condemned the allegations in the strongest possible terms, saying, “It’s f&*%ing bull*&^#.”  He went further to explain the Romney’s mother is so fat that when she sits around the house, she sits around the house.  He ended his statement with, “Neener, neener!”

Sarah Palin, professional Attention Whore, fired back, accusing the president of actually being born with cooties, and again calling for a release of Obama’s birth records.  Harry Reid retaliated, quoting a secret source who confirms that on Romney’s past tax returns, he did in fact list his occupation as “Doodyhead.”

Regardless of the president’s health or the actual size of Romney’s mother, this election is certainly shaping up to be a game-changer in American politics.